Episode 59 - STATE OF ORIGIN EDITION! NSW v QLD, TRUMP v IRAN, TRUMP v OMAN and TRUMP v TRUMP JR!
In this week’s tour of the world’s Crooks, F*ckwits & Morons, it’s State vs State and Mate vs Mate as:
NSW Blues conjure miracle win against those dirty filthy cheating Queenslanders - they've been traumatising Henry since he was 7 years old!
Donald Trump Sr disses Donald Trump Jr by ditching his wedding in favour of doing actual work! - Holy Pertainment, Batman, are the Daddy issues that bad?
And dud Aussie Treasurer Jim Chalmers hits Aussies with a Kalyn Ponga-style no-arms, high-velocity head-butt/shoulder-charge right in the financial cranium! - “Where’s your eyes, Ref? OFF! OFF! OFF!”
Relax with 5 pints of Guinness at The Steam Packet Inn, Williamstown, or 4 steins of Pilsner at The Grand Duke Inn, Luxembourg, or even 2 jugs of milk at The Penelope Cruz Taverna, Madrid, while we unpack the biggest global news:
Daylight robbery at the Australian Audio Awards as Instant Experts loses Best Station-Produced Infomercial to “We Fry Dogs” campaign on Cujo-FM
Confusion in Iran as the war drags on, off and on again, like late-period Bennifer or all-period Rudd-Gillard-Rudd or Albo-Chalmers-wait-sorry that's next year
Chaos in Texas as Kenny Paxton mistakes Senate nomination form for his entry into C*nt of The Week
Plus Henry explains bonds, golf iron covers and the Centenary Test in the breeziest 9 hours of your life!
It's another bumper episode of Instant Experts, in which we explore the c*nts of the world, the C*nts of the Week and, for the first time ever, Enhanced C*nts so juiced they exceeded WADA Allowable C*ntiness Guidelines by 111%! They give Collingwood fans a bad name, and even Thomas Massie won’t read them into the record!
In the comedy podcast with all the latest news, explained by idiots - The Honk & Henry Lee (Sen Dr Bill Cassidy held up finding prime spot at next WH Correspondents Dinner)
Say hi to us by email at: gday@instantexperts.com.au
Or be heard everywhere from Richmond on Thames to Riga which is in Latvia, with a voicemail to play on the show, right from our home page.
All complaints to: ivegotcancer@yourefired.gov.us
Audio produced, compiled and mixed by Junior
Video designed, compiled, edited by Guantanamo Babe
Digital design and social media also by Guantanamo Babe
Episode edited by Honk. Assistant editing by E. Jean Carroll. E. Jean Carroll assistant editing re-edited by Donald J Trump.
For Texas A-G Kenny Paxton's rap sheet: https://www.instagram.com/p/DY0xDWakVH9
For C**t of the Week's pixilated doodle but visibly sh*t-soaked shorts: https://www.news.com.au/travel/travel-updates/incidents/drunk-aussie-tourist-flashes-genitals-while-on-holiday-in-thailand/news-story/a258b116fbe67d1484ce165417c3bb2e
For the Amarillo Armadillo: www.eXtremeRestraints.com
When in Kiama, Honk and Henry stay exclusively at Blue Haven Bonaira Nursing Home. Mention our names for a special rate of only $39,000 a night* (*volunteer free concert not included)
Laura Loomer currently has political advisory capacity - "I hear she gives a great bl*wjob!" - J. Loomer (client)
James Magnusson explains awful Enhanced Games swim - "I had Arby's in my pants!"
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